The mousowl's song. This was written in Japanese in Jun 17, 2004. And, it was translated to English in Jun 20, 2004.			
		  
		Once upon a time, creature called mousowl was living in the certain forest. But, no one knows of why creature like that appeared. And, no one knows when he disappeared. The clear thing is only that he appears to this world as a time, becoming the monstrous being, regretting to have given up this world. What ? Did you say "does it appear to do what?" ? As a matter of fact, that is serious question. But, before telling about the thing, it has to state how he was living when he was the creature. It is because it seems it can understand about why he became the monstrous being.
		
	Now, when the mousowl was born, various birds and animals, and so on already were living on the earth, obeying each way for the life. For example, the mouse, catching the insects and gathering the nuts, and so on, was keeping one's life. And, the eared owl, catching the rats and other small animal and fishes and so on, made them one's nourishment. In that meaning, they were a part of the food chain and ecosystem. However, to the middle of such situation, mousowl appeared suddenly. When it sees, to all appearances, his feature and habit are the mix of the mouse and owl. The creatures already living in the forest, looking at his uncanny looks, were bewildered very much. But, the really bewildered rather was the mousowl itself. Although for him, the mouse and owl both were to be the same kind as oneself, it was because the owl often looks to be the natural enemy of oneself as the mouse, as a time, looks to be the food. In other words, he was troubled because of the two different understandings about the mouse and owl and also oneself.
		  
	However, this is the very common matters heard frequently in the world. But, he doesn't know such a thing. "Who am I on earth ?" He, feeling the unidentifiable uneasiness, continued to think about the thing desperately. But, since at that time, there still wasn't the word "mousowl" in this world, he can't find out one's name. He finally thought one's name is either of the mouse or owl. "However, is my name mouse ? Or, is it owl ?" First of all, it has to know the thing anyway. So, when finding the mouse, he called out to the mouse, saying "Hey you!". "By any chance, he may know my name". It was because there was the expectancy like that in his heart. However, once the mouse, turning the face to him, looked at him, it, suddenly jumping and running away, disappears somewhere at once. So, next time, he approached to the mouse with the ingratiating smile. But, the result was the same as before at all though it doesn't know why. Conversely, the owl, when finding him, always attacks him with the horrible looks. "Why is it ? It is too terrible for I think him to be my family.". But, the reality seems to be different from his thought though it doesn't know why. He fell into the terrible confusion. Furthermore, other animals are unkind to the mousowl, too. "By what reason is this ?". He thought about the thing desperately. But, it can notice nothing after all. The mousowl was caught to the terrible depression because of the too deep loneliness.
		The wise reader, that is, you would be knowing this kind of dilemma is being stated in the various stories. But, since the mousowl doesn't read the book, and so on at all, it almost can't imagine one's fate. He, while cursing the god, going into the hollow of the decayed tree, continued to sleep simply to escape from the reality. And, it continued to see the desirable dream desperately. It is because he had the ability like that strangely.
		   
	But, even if it is sleeping, since it is living persistently, it can't but feel the hunger. "Isn't there food somewhere ?". He, rising up narrowly with the dull feeling, peeped about the sight of outside from the hollow. Just then, just under the hollow, it sees a rat is gathering the acorn and so on. He thought to catch the rat suddenly. Since he at that time was feeling the terrible hunger, it would be the instinctive impulse probably. But, for him, the rat is the existence like his family. "The higher animal shouldn't do the cannibalism". He, when coming to oneself suddenly, returned to the corner of the hollow in disappointment. However, how should it gain the food ? A moment, he thought to eat the insects. But, since his wings weren't created too detailedly, it can't fly too well. So, it seems to be very hard it catches the insects flying in the rapid move. If so, should it look for the insects with digging the ground ? However, since his front legs are wings not having the claws, it also is hard to dig the ground. It only can find out the insects narrowly, digging the ground with the rear legs clumsily. Anyhow, it will need the long time considerably if it tries to catch one insect. It is said well time is money. Now that the things have come to this pass, it really is recollected as the feeling of reality. If it tries to fill one's stomach, how many insects does it need ? When it think of the thing, it feels gloomy terribly. Thereupon, he decided to eat the soft fruits and the grasses, and so on reluctantly. It was because it seems they can be found out simply and eaten easily though, for him, they weren't so good-tasting foods. Of course, there were many good-tasting hard nuts in the forest. But, since his beak is very small, hasn't the teeth at all, there almost isn't the fortunate chance to eat the hard nuts, for example, the walnut and so on. And, it also isn't so easy to eat the acorns and chestnuts. It was because the rats and squirrels take the hard nuts earlier than him, and hide them somewhere. Unfortunately, his stomach refuses the hard foods. So, it is that he had to wait until the nuts become ripe completely.
	Furthermore, even if he found out the completely ripe nut, a spiteful crow grabs it in front of his eyes and sneers at him while flying upon his head, showing that nut. Against hungry person, what a terrible behavior it is ! However, it may be natural for the crow because it is the crow's living habit. The mousowl gave up the hard nuts reluctantly, thinking like that. However, what a inconvenient body it is ! The other animal each are living full of vigor with each characteristic ability. But, why am only I like that ? He had cursed oneself before noticing. Unfortunately, he hasn't the habit to store the food. If not, it seems it could eat the mature nuts, storing the immature nuts.
		 
	Although there are many good taste foods very near oneself, it almost can't eat them. What a tragic situation it is ! "Am I creature really ?" The mousowl was caught to such doubt suddenly. It is said well "feeling the hunger is the proof of living". But, it seems all living things can leave each posterity to this world, continuing to live because there is the joy of life in this world. In that reason, in the certain nation's constitution, there is the provision that the people have the right to living healthy and cultural life. But, since there is the interpretation saying that it is mere target for the effort, to all appearances, it doesn't seem it is being carried out so obediently, as it is. At any rate, the lonely and clumsy mousowl hadn't such joy at all. Or, would it have to be said he couldn't find out such a thing ? Though it doesn't know well of whether which is proper expression, his life in this world was miserable terribly, oppressed. However, it needs the mental support of something if it tries to survive. So, the mousowl made one's mind the songs. And, in the dead of night, he often sung, going up to the top of big tree. Since all creatures are sleeping, no one is hearing his song. Though he often is caught to the hollow mind and loneliness, his solo recital continued lonely ceaselessly. And, his songs reach fairies, ghosts and monstrous beings, and so on soon. When it notices, souls different from the existence of this world were gathering, surrounding him. "By any chance, I may be fairy of something". He was caught to the idea like that soon.
		However, the fairies aren't thinking him to be the family. It is because it was very hard a soul with the hatred is fairy even if such hatred is a little. Thereupon, the mousowl continued to sing own songs, changing oneself to the monstrous being reluctantly. It is because it doesn't seem the material world to bring only the pain has the value for living. However, it isn't he died. Therefore, it also doesn't mean he became the ghost. Can you understand this logic ? At any rate, he changed to the uncanny existence in that it isn't staying at the material world though living in this world. So, if you can hear the mousowl's song, by any chance, it may be possible to understand his true heart even if it can't see him itself. And, probably, it is that it also is the stagnated unknown heart to your depths.
		
      
Cotosiro