================================================================== 18-1.The chaos of the gods and goddesses. From The myth of the shade. ==================================================================
		This, written in Japanese, was issued in Justnet in 1997 year, was translated to English in 2001 year. And, it, revised, was issued in Nyfty in September 29, 2004. But, since I don't know English so well, it doesn't know whether this expression is proper or not. Hiromasa Noguti.
	At that time, the soul of Amano and the strong bitterness out of him, giving off the horrific psychic force, were fighting each other. They can see nothing else but each opponent any more. And, in that reason, all the phenomenon except them was concealed for their consciousness. Just then, light is lost. Then, all the things having shape also have vanished from the world. Of course, their body also can't be seen any more. It probably seems they went into the feeling idea world out of the physical world. When it notices, two aura of anger were giving off the mysterious light, floating in the darkness quietly. It seems to be everlasting battle because the space and also the time are in the state lost any more. Really, it was the unimaginable world having to be said to be the absolute nil if the feeling idea doesn't exist. While there is nothing, it includes all. It was the strange and mysterious darkness able to create light. In the place like that, two souls of them were fighting hard. It is that they pulled each other with the endless power, trying to swallow up opponent to dye the opponent with one's feeling idea.
				And, soon they began to shrink, falling into the intertwined state because of their force like that. The shrinkage like that, while causing the heat gradually, begin to give off the mysterious brightness from the one place of the darkness. And, it transformed the aspect of the darkness with burning the feeling idea world with darkish red. It already is the deep-rooted conflict caused in the time and space of nil if it is said as the figure of speech. Anyhow, it was the psychic and profound battle as the evolution of the feeling idea. However, such a profound meaning is in the state hidden against them firmly. They fought hard increasingly, making the consciousness concentrate to only the opponent.
	Two intertwined souls, while keeping accumulating the horrific heat increasingly with being compressed, are keeping shrinking rapidly toward the minimum. That sight makes a person feel a horrible presentiment of something. But, they notice nothing about the thing. They only keep shrinking while making their contradiction strong at the mysterious darkness. The thesis and the antithesis only are the thesis and the antithesis as before, not sublated at all. It seemed they disappear soon if it only keeps on shrinking as before. But, it is strange. When it seemed they lost their size, it suddenly burst and shined up the darkness, giving off the bright light far quicker than the so-called light. When it notices, the feeling idea world already is filled with the light like that. It seemed the mysterious darkness was driven away completely, covered by the cloud of light. But, look at that ! It is different from the so-called light surely. As a matter of fact, it was the countless bright particles born of the burst two souls because of Amano's contradictions. When it notices, whole of bright cloud is in the state separated into the countless bright clouds. And, those bright clouds continued to expand each distance gradually. But, the particles near each draw each other to one's side, and start to form the countless photons gradually. So, between each photon, strange darkness came to be seen soon. Since the darkness compressed the cloud of light, the photons were born. It may be able to think like that. Anyhow, the photons are making the more bright whirlpools grow from the bright clouds with gathering together with other photons. And, here and there, groups of the bright whirlpools appeared. Its sight really is countless Galaxies very dense. Those bright whirlpools, while pulsating mysteriously, were floating on the profound darkness.
	However, while these Galaxies continue to expand each distance, those whirlpools each continue to be compressed. And, they appeared as gods and goddesses, showing off each divine nature in a moment when it finished shrinking. In other words, really at that time, the particles of the burst soul, forming the new gods and goddesses, appeared in front of eyes clearly. When it sees, they all are making the faces shine with expectancy of living. God Coto-siro-nusi-nho-mikoto was seen there. Goddess Miho-tu-hime-nho-mikoto also was shining brightly there as well. And, even Miyagi and Yamagishi or others also were shining there as gods and goddesses though they are common person. However, there is one person not there. It was Amano. Amano couldn't notice one's hidden feeling idea besides the own definite desires probably. Or, it may be he was thinking it drove out the hidden feeling idea like that from one's heart completely. Anyhow, he couldn't sublate own contradiction. So, he must have fallen into the ruin.
	It is impossible the feeling idea of something disappear completely because it is the feeling idea persistently even if it is suppressed mentally completely. It, hiding oneself somewhere, necessarily appears some day. Even if the person suppressing the own certain feeling idea without consciousness is oneself, the appropriateness about the thing doesn't change. The feeling idea suppressed like that gives the horrific curse the birth, bearing heat in the depths of the mind. And, it is the deep-seated curse given off not only against the others but also against oneself. To tell the truth, Amano should have noticed the thing. However, he unconsciously made such a curse grow to the vengeful ghost without noticing the thing. So, it is that the soul of him, torn, became the minute particles of the feeling idea, like the clouds. However, new gods and goddesses are keeping on being born one after another from the clouds of the feeling idea like that really now. And, they have started to create new world, while dyeing the darkness of nil the various feeling idea world with their characteristic colors. For the moment, it is the innocent self-expansion. Apparently it seemed they hold the complete freedom. But, the self-realization of one god was the obstacle for other gods and goddesses. In that reason, they often couldn't but collide in the feeling idea world. So, not until they each collided, they barely could understand there are the others besides oneself. And, concept of self and concept of other also were perceived. Then, at the same time, the materialization of one's feeling idea also was perceived as very difficult works. In passing, all the other concepts, based on these two concepts, were born. "The self-realization can't be completed without the disappearance of others." They easily thought so at that time. So, the horrific battle came to unroll, involving all the gods and goddesses as if it is natural. The weaker decrease gradually, being blown off, or sucked by the stronger. And, the stronger souls began to shine more brightly, becoming stronger increasingly.
			However, such circumstances included the deep-rooted contradiction even gods and goddesses don't notice. The gods and goddesses each got the consciousness, perceiving from the space-time of nil the existence different from oneself. In other words, at that time, they had evolved to the existence able to recognize others. The recognition is nothing else but to be the recognizing the other existence because even one's self is the object at that time. Since the recognition about oneself needs the comparing of oneself and others, the recognition about oneself is impossible if there isn't the recognition about others.
	Therefore, soon the other existence regarded as the obstacle for one god came to be perceived as the others who shouldn't disappear. It is because the disappearance of the others means the disappearance of oneself at least mentally. If the others don't exist, for gods and goddesses, one's self was the same as not existing. At any rate, they were put on the dilemma like that at that time. So, soon they notice the dangerous trap hiding to their battle. It is the Satan's trap trying to bring the disappearance of the cognition-person itself with the disappearance of others. So, they wished "The ideal world able to dye all with one's feeling idea while making others exist", and prayed for the materialization of the world like that for oneself each. Thereupon, from each consciousness, each universe was created. Of course, those universes each are the independent individual universes. As far as gods and goddesses each are in the own universe, the collision of them could be dodged well. And, in that reason, they each could materialize of one's feeling idea without the others' obstruction. Moreover, into the universe like that, there are various things making possible to perceive oneself for the cognition-person like that, that is, the Creator. In other words, other gods having each universe and also goddesses were in that universe as well, becoming the physical things, that is, rock, tree, animal and person, and so on. And, the Creator made them do the expression of their feeling idea only in the physical things like that. For the Creator, it was because the others, that is, objects should exist as gods and goddesses, not as the mere physical existence persistently. And, the gods and goddesses like that each were keeping one's feeling idea certainly. But, it was almost hopeless they get out from the Creator's feeling idea if it is seen logically. It is because they each were shut into the logic of the physical things of each. So, for the moment, the Creator's intention seemed to get the success.
			At first, gods and goddesses were the feeling idea. And, they were born out of the nil-dimensional world not having the space-time, and others. Of course, it is impossible nil-dimensional world is moved by the causation. By any chance, there may have not been even logical relations in that world. However, it is certain it was the origin of space-time because gods and goddesses were born, holding each logic. In other words, it is the feeling idea itself called in this case the Creator or the cognition-subject. And, it also can say it is in the only one mathematical speck called present if it dare look for it into the space-time.
	In other words, the mathematical speck like that is the space-time to be born in a moment when a person recollects the past or thinks the future. Rather the space-time may be the existence like that originally. Anyhow, all the universes were born out of the place like that. The Big bang is only logical result of the feeling idea. The true creation of universe started from the mathematical speck like that, that is, cognition-subject really. The existence able to create universe is nothing else but to be the Creator, that is, the only cognition-subject of its universe. Even if it is god, the others weren't allowed to meddle to such a creation. And, really, the thing was to be guaranteeing self-realization for the gods and goddesses who is as the Creator. But, ironically, the movement of the universe created like that betrayed the gods and goddesses at their expectancy. When the universe is recognized as the universe, it is because it appeared as the new object for the Creator and caused a serious situation. In other words, at that moment, the space-time starts to move ceaselessly by the logical relations and causation. Even if it is the gods and goddesses, if it exists as the physical things, it couldn't but change because of such movement of universe though the gods and goddesses like that shouldn't change for the Creator. In other words, it was impossible the universe always moves in the Creator's intention. It is that all the things in the universe became the others for the Creator and confronted the Creator. In the digression, it seems the above thing gives the suggestion for some paradoxes related to the uncertainty principle. Since the cognition-person, that is, the Creator exists everywhere, the countless universe always are branching from one universe. Or, there may be completely isolated individual universe. At any rate, the perception to the other universe is allowed no one besides the Creator of its universe as the principle because it is the possibility world for the others. In other words, for one Creator, since the universe different from his universe is vaguer than the electron cloud, it can be said to be almost same as nil if it thinks it in common sense.
	By the way, for the gods and goddesses, that is, the Creators, there also were the other troubles furthermore. To one's surprise, it is that the Creator, that is, cognition-person itself was changed by the movement of one's universe. Even if it is the Creator, his movement in the space-time has to obey the logical relations and causation because in this case, he is cognition-person. If the Creator dare to ignore such logic of space-time, the result from such behavior seemed to be tragic. It is clear that the Creator collides with space-time's logic. It seemed to be natural such careless action makes the space-time collapse. Even if it is god, it seems it is very hard it restores the universe destroyed like that.
	By any chance, in this case, the Creator may fall into ruin together with the universe. So, the gods and goddesses lost the complete liberty in the circumstances. And, there was another problem for them furthermore. It is because the feeling idea born in one universe are transmitted as the unidentifiable undulation to the other universes. The gods and goddesses all exist to each universe as the physical things. In other words, the same god as one god is in other universe as well. Therefore, they were in the state linked by the unidentifiable string as if it is the identical twins though they each are in the different universes. In other words, contrary to their expectancy, the feeling idea could pass through the wall of space-time. So, the movement of universe often conflicted with the Creator's intention also in such meaning. For the Creator, the universe has to be in a state of equilibrium insistently. However, the universe wasn't allowed to be in such state in all the meaning because of the logic of universe. In spite of that, the gods and goddesses are continuing to create each universe one after another, trying to make sound plausible about the universe contradicting their intention. But, the universe was the universe persistently. The state of equilibrium was destroyed as soon as the universe is created. Would it be because they don't know the time ? Anyhow, the gods and goddesses seems to not know the giving up. They kept creating the new universe insistently. Even the gods and goddesses restricted into the space-time keep creating own universe. If it views that sight from the outside of space-time, the births of the gods and goddesses and the births of universes would be unrolled in front of eyes as if it is the endless mandala really. Really, it is endless confusion ! Fear to the nothingness made a heart tremble though it doesn't know why.
			Just then, someone is whispering in low voice somewhere. It seems it is saying "But, is there nothing besides such a confusion ?". I listened carefully to that voice. "There must be something having the love and consistency somewhere surely. And, it is something sublating the confusion like that probably." It was saying like that. Would it be a consciousness body having the body ? To all appearances, it seems it was viewing the course of events from the beginning. And, it also can see his irritation from the murmur like a sigh. Limited short times of him must have brought the impatience. He also didn't know the giving up same as gods and goddesses. The gods and goddesses created the universe at the risk of his life. However, the universe betrayed the Creator. And, all the things keep advancing hard toward the limit of confusion.
	But, the gods and goddesses kept creating the universes as if it was possessed to someone. And, the universe created like that kept giving the gods and goddesses the birth as the physical things in this world. To all appearances, it is the endless confusion. However, it seems he feels the presentiment of something from the depths of such confusion. Or, it may be the expectancy of one salvation. At any rate, it was something having the aspect sublating all the confusion. The confusion between the gods and goddesses and the universes, itself seems to be in the equilibrium if it sees that aspect rising above space-time. However, if that confusion is a kind of movement, the equilibrium like that would be not everlasting probably. It seems it necessarily gives something the birth, creating new movement. And, something like that is to be in the feeling idea world not having the space-time probably. "But, where is it ? What kind of world is it ? Why can't I see it ?" He kept on thinking about the thing while suffering from mental agony. However, would it be proper it understands the confusion of the gods and goddesses and the universe to be a kind of movement ? To all appearances, the understanding like that seems to include the contradiction. At least, it couldn't be said to be the logical thought. But, it seems he dare to be trying to find out something like that. And, he looked to be believing something like that to sublate all confusion though it seems there isn't that he ever saw it.
 
Cotosiro