To old edition.
			The dream like reality.         The former English revised edition was revised like this in November 2, 2013. Hiromasa Noguti.
		1. The voice the soul hard to see gives off.
	"How long would I have slept?" I suddenly got caught to the question like that while seeing a dream. It probably would be because it took back the consciousness a little, with suddenly feeling a chill on the face. But it still isn't the situation it can say that it woke completely. By any chance, would it be better to say I was between the sleeping and the waking? Although I'm aware of the thing that one's self is seeing a dream, I who is in a dream is understanding the dream is reality. Probably I was in the situation like that at that time. So I seem to have been caught to the question like that by chance. Needless to say, the reason why it was caught to the question like that isn't so clear because it is the question caused in a dream. At that time I anyway started to inspect one's memory, trying to solve the question. However, it can't recollect my memory though I don't know why. Although it is the unbelievable thing, it is that I had forgotten even my name. So I got bewildered terribly in spite of oneself. And, I tried to recollect my memory desperately, forgetting completely the thing being the dream. However, as it thought before I can't recollect the memory I'm supposed to have. For a moment fragments of memory only cross my mind. And strangely I can't judge whether that is my memory or not. "By any chance isn't my mind in the normal condition?" I suddenly got caught to the anxiousness like that. And I also fell into the desperate mood, thinking that I may recollect nothing about myself everlastingly. It mentally resembles the situation that it is into the dark and broad prison by oneself. Anyway I from the heart wanted to escape from this situation. Just then, I heard the voice which murmurs at the inside of my head. It is that it says "Isn't this the forgetfulness caused at the dream?". So, I narrowly noticed the core of the trouble I met. Certainly I'm seeing the dream just now. If so, it would be better to think the thing murmur has suggested is proper. "The reason why I couldn't recollect my history is the effect of the dream. If so, it is meaningless that it tries to recollect my history in this situation." I, with having thought like that, narrowly could escape from the uneasiness brought from my strange forgetfulness. However, it isn't that my anxiousness disappeared completely. So, I urged me to wake up at once because it thought that it is better to wake up for my mental condition.
				However, my body says to me that it still doesn't want to wake up because it is very tired. And, I'm also in the mood to want to still be sleeping. So, I thought a little about whether it should wake up or not. And I noticed that I would recollect the memory easily if I wake up, because this is the forgetfulness caused at the dream. If so, it seems that it isn't necessary to wake up, hurrying. If I find other more comfortable dream and get in there, it seems that it can dodge the weird forgetfulness in question. So, I started to look for a likable dream. But the thing doesn't go so well. My soul started to float toward reality, resisting the intention which tries to keep on sleeping as if it is a bubble floating into the deep sea. Probably it must be because my consciousness became active because of having thought variously about looking for other dream, or because of having thought about whether it should keep on sleeping or not. Needless to say, in this case, it isn't necessary to keep on sleeping. But strangely I who am in the dream am attached to the sleeping. So, I tried to stay in the sleep, scolding me for being about to wake. But it doesn't know which me did so in this case. However it is obvious that the behavior like that gives my sleep a converse effect. Since my consciousness became active increasingly because of my stupid behavior, Morpheus started to wither rapidly. And although I don't know whether it is its effect or not, I feel the rough touch like rocks on my back and also feel a chill wind on whole of my body strangely. To all appearances, it isn't the situation able to keep on sleeping. I reluctantly opened the eyes, when moving my body a little as if it wriggles. However would what on earth have happened? There is an unexpected sight there. A half moon was floating in the middle of bluish darkness, giving off mysterious pale light. But I'm still under the impression that I have been sleeping on the bed. So, I unable to accept this situation at once, stared at the half moon vacantly for a while.
	When it notices suddenly, thickly growing silver grasses, weeds, and so on are waving slightly because of the light wind. That sight is weird, looking like ghosts's beckoning. By any chance, would it be this is wasteland the evil spirits live in? But, why am I here? I, caught to the various questions, tried to trace my memory to find out the answers. However I almost can recollect nothing though I don't know why. It only can feel it has kept on traveling for long. Anyhow, this tiredness keeping on oppressing my mind doesn't seem to be an usual. Would it be it fell down in here at last, losing the vigor because of the long painful travel? But the memory about the thing isn't clear, too. "By any chance, this may be the dream, too". I got caught to the thinking like that suddenly. However it doesn't seem to be so somehow. "The dream of the forgetfulness I saw just before must have been the presentiment of this situation". For the moment I understood like that. And I, while still laying oneself on the ground of the weeds, tried to know the circumstances of the wasteland, moving only the eyes. However the growing weeds and so on are obstructing the view completely. As it thought, it seems that it needs to stand up. So, I lifted up my head a little, trying to raise oneself though it feels the body is heavy strangely. Just then, I see that a night dew on the silver grass hanging down over me drops toward me suddenly. But, I can't dodge the night dew because of the sudden drop. The night dew hit my forehead heartlessly. And, when it runs along the brows at once, it dropped to the ground from my forehead coldly. The sense like that makes me feel an uneasy presentiment strangely. So, I had stood up before noticing.
	However, why would the sight of this wasteland look cold like this ? I, getting stunned, kept on staring at the rough wasteland the silver grasses and weeds or other are growing on. And soon I, suddenly recalled I saw this sight before. "I recalled, I certainly was walking this wasteland until yesterday" I uttered in spite of oneself, being glad to have recalled that memory. Ever since I got in this wasteland, I kept on walking this rough land with eating nothing and putting the time for sleep into the walking. However, I still can't recollect why I came here and where I had tried to go to. Although I tried to recollect the thing desperately, the memory in question doesn't show even its outline, hidden by the dense fog. Probably this would be the effect of devilishness this wasteland gives off. If so, the thing I should do now must be the getting out of this wasteland as soon as possible. And if I could do so, it seems that I can recollect the place it should go to. But if it can do so easy, I wouldn't have the hard time like this. It first doesn't know where it should go toward, to get out of this wasteland. Although it turns the eyes to various directions, all of the sight almost look to be same as each. It can't find out the target to decide a direction it should go toward. So, I, not knowing how to do, started to walk toward the downwind direction. Needless to say, it is because it seemed to be easy to walk toward the downwind direction than the windward direction. However, at that time, I had gotten caught to the strange feeling. It is that I felt it had experienced the series of the thinking and behavior like this several times. "By any chance, this may be I am repeating same things". I also got caught to the thinking like that suddenly. And although not knowing why, I also got caught to the feeling of hunger and the feeling of loneliness. Furthermore, terrible tiredness felt when waking up attacks me, becoming more terrible. Probably it would be the effect of the hunger and loneliness. When noticing, I had stopped the walking. "I can't walk anymore. Do I die here?". I murmured like that in spite of oneself. But it seems to be too unreasonable to decide this is the conclusion. "There necessarily is the place I should go somewhere. Anyway I have to live until I go there." I, when telling oneself like that, started to walk again with the legs becoming heavy increasingly because of the terrible tiredness. Cold wind is blowing on my back persistently. It seems that the humidity is increasing. "Would this be the sign saying that a storm comes soon?". I, when asking oneself like that, looked up at the dim sky with the knitted brows. However, apparently it seems to not be cloud so thick that rain falls. I bent my head to one side, feeling the gap between my hunch about weather and the actual sky is strange. Just then, sudden wind blew at me. Apparently a direction of the wind looks to have changed. Anyhow the air the wind brings makes me feel the dangerous coldness as if it like, is the keen knife. I turned my face away from the cold wind in spite of oneself.
			Just then, although it doesn't know why, horrible image like phantom crosses my mind. Devils and demons who try to hide truth. And monstrous beings who try to lead me to get in nothingness. It is that the memory or scene like that crossed my mind one after another. "I recalled! I many times had fought with them here and had roamed around this wasteland, escaping from them as a time". I had murmured like that before noticing. However, strangely it still can't recollect the place it should go to, in spite of my effort. It probably seems that I repeated this process many times until now. When noticing the thing, I as if it falls down sat down to the ground. And I, when drooping my head, stared at my hands put on the knees. It seems that the cold wind often blowing at me sneers at me. However, why do I feel the sneer like that? By any chance, it may be because foolishly I can't notice the things others can notice easily. Well, I don't care a damn how people sneer at me. I will accept about any sneer the behavior of the people like that as a fact. It is because the sneer like that show the limit of the wisdom the people like that have. But it isn't so important. The true important thing on this is the thing there necessarily is thing no one can know except me. So, I must be continuing this travel to look for the truth like that. Although there still are many it can't recollect, as for this, it seems to be certain. I, when believing like that firmly, again stood up and started to walk. But, when walking for a while, it feels there is someone behind me. I looked back suddenly. However, the things I see are only the silver grasses and weeds and so on waving in the cold wind. "Although I felt there is someone, that was my illusion?". I, when thinking so, was disappointed though not knowing why. Just then, someone whispers from behind me. It certainly had said "Don't give up, because you never be a loser until you say I got defeated". It is the words which catch the heart. I had looked back before noticing. However, there is no one. "That may have been god's voice!". Expectancy like that crossed my mind for a moment. However unfortunately I almost know nothing about god. I was estranged from god ever since I was born though it often met demon and monster, and so on. So, it was hard to accept existence of god. But, on the other hand, it is that it also can't but want to see god if that voice is god's voice. Although there also was one's self whispering "the voice in question is the product of a demon's intrigue", I tried to look at god in that wasteland.
	However, the moon is hidden by thick cloud though it doesn't know from when. So, the darkness of the night is deep horribly. Furthermore, the coldness of the wind had become severe more than before. If this is the sign that storm comes, it would become hard increasingly to find out god. That I now have heard the voice a god seems to have cast to me seems to be rare opportunity to see god. In spite of that, why do I meet a troublesome trouble like this whenever the great chance comes? This seems to be unreasonable terribly. I got caught to the strong anger. "This all must be the trap the demons plotted. They are obstructing me meeting god. By any chance, the demon may have pretended the god's voice, trying to deceive me". I had murmured like that before noticing. Yes, at that time, I had gotten into the dark labyrinth because of the situation that doubts beget doubts, before noticing. And, I met another me there. He says with the firm belief " the god and monstrous beings, and so on are a product of imagination". So, I got possessed to his opinion at once. It was because his opinion seemed attractive terrifically. "Yes, that voice also must be the phantom born of my longing for god. By any chance, I who is thinking like this oneself may be the phantom. All is phantom!". I for a moment fell into the thought which deny all existence. However, would the thought like that be right really? I stopped walking before noticing and sank into the thought. I about ten years ago got into this bleak wasteland which gives off the uncanny atmosphere as a time. And, I was obliged to roam this wasteland for long, unable to get out of here though not knowing why. But until now, I couldn't find out even a insect to say nothing of a person. It may have been natural that a lonely feeling, a inexpressible fear and a helpless feeling, and so on gather. So, it may be that I hoped the god which will rescue me from this detestable wasteland and devilish spirits. It probably was because the inexpressible fear, and so on I have invited the demons or other in here as real existence from the world of image. In spite of that, it may be that the god I hoped from the heart didn't become real existence.
	However, would it be so really? When I keep on walking this labyrinth furthermore, it can find out the thinking different from that. And, the major premise of this thinking was the thing that this wasteland isn't the real world. If so, a voice may exist without the body. And, the body may exist without the spirit. And if so, the meanings the voice in question gave me seem to exist obviously whether that voice is my fancy or not. However, should I accept that the meanings which would exist like that are truth ? Or conversely, should I deny it, thinking it is false? Probably it seems that whether it is truth or not depends on my choice. "It must be I kept on walking like this for long to finish judging the thing.". I got caught to the thought like that for a moment. "However, is there a good reward of something with walking more, obeying the voice's suggestion?". I had also gotten caught to the doubt like that. The sense of tiredness obstinately coiling around me is tormenting me for long. The tiredness makes the mind weak. When I feel a void suddenly, temptation to nothingness tempted me persistently, becoming stronger. And I started to walk the depths of labyrinth toward the nothingness. But, I, again hearing the voice in question, stopped. "Listen to me! Don't ask the meaningless question like that, because it does nothing else but to make you waver. Realize the importance of the meaning you are living now!". It is that the voice had said like that. Certainly these words may have been trustworthy if it considers the thing it felt from the undulation of the voice the solemn and thoughtful atmosphere. However, unfortunately I couldn't understand the meanings of the words at that time. "What? Why is the thinking about the future meaningless? What do you mean? Who on earth are you?". I asked the voice the answer, saying like that in spite of oneself. Just then, someone starts to speak something at once though it is god probably. But, I can't hear what he is saying. It was because weird wind drowns out the voice with blowing suddenly. However, why is god's voice weak like that whenever it tells me? I got caught to the impulse to complain about the thing for a moment. But, it seems to be important that it heard the voice in question, probably god's voice at last if it considers the thing it couldn't hear the god's voice for long. That may be the effort it kept on doing for long wasn't a lost labor. When I thought like that, my impulse to know the true intention of god became stronger increasingly. And I furthermore tried to listen to the holy voice, making my ears sensitive.
	However, the sudden wind becomes more terrible and torments me persistently. The horrible wind sound is like a monster's roar. Atmosphere of devilishness overpowered my five senses. "Evil spirits are obstructing me meeting the god.". I believed so firmly at once. And this shows the thing that god, Satan, and evil spirit, and so on all are real existence at least for me. "However, can I believe the god from the heart ?". I asked me like that at once. There wasn't the thing the god helps me though I asked god's help many times, while continuing this travel. It was so as far as I know. Although it doesn't know the god's intention, it doesn't seem that the god's attitude to me changes also in future. In spite of that, I can't discard my hope to hear the god's voice more clearly. However, it is certain that the evil spirits are moving toward me if it considers the situation. Furthermore, my heart and body is tired terribly. If I meet an evil spirit in this situation,, it would be hard to fight with. By any chance, even escaping may be impossible. "I have to leave from here at once". I, when thinking so, desperately started to run on the rough wasteland with the storm, without saying even good-by to the god. However, it is the surprise that my vigor wasn't lost in spite of this terrible tiredness. Although it even seems to be strange, this was the fortunate situation for me. If I keep exposing myself to this uncanny wind as it is, it must see a horrible phantom. And, it would be drawn into nothingness by an evil spirit or by other. Even if I lose my body, finishing using my physical strength, there is the thing it has to dodge. "Don't fall into nothingness at any cost". I ordered me like that. It was because nothingness is ultimate loneliness and is ultimate hell. Until this, I continued this travel, while taking care that it isn't found out by an evil spirit and so on ever since it noticed there is the place full of demons here. In spite of that, an evil spirit or other often found out me with the sharp eyed sense of smell and made me fall into a more hard situation. And, it, while staring at me, told me "go into nothingness if you want to go out of this hell" in the coaxing voice or with threat. Needless to say, it would be impossible to live peacefully if it falls into the nothingness. Although I am in the hell for long, I can recognize at least this place is the hell because I still isn't getting in the nothingness. If it falls into the nothingness, it would be impossible to recognize not only peace but even hell because recognition can't be at the world of nothingness. The getting in the nothingness means the losing a soul, that is, the complete death. And it also means the evaporation of my world. So, it probably would be that I started this painful travel, to defend me and my world from the nothingness.
				However, an evil spirit again drew me away from the god here. And it cornered me so persistent that I start to think the god is nowhere. The storm filled with devilishness is blowing to me with terrible coldness, trying to make me surrender to the nothingness now. Needless to say, it isn't permitted that it falls into the evil's trap like that. I, to protect my recognition from the nothingness, have to escape from an evil spirit even if I die because of hunger. However, where should I escape toward? The storm attacks me from every direction, with the coldness that I didn't experience until now. I looked for the direction able to escape, while fighting with my impatient mind. And soon, it can see far a small mountain with the thickly growing trees is floating into the dark. It was the semicircular mountain covered by mysterious mist. "Oh, that looks good!". I, when murmuring like that, started to run toward the mountain, moving by force my chilled legs and arms. However, the wind blows on me persistently as if it is a snake which tries to coil around me. And, a horrible phantom vision often crosses my mind. It is that an evil spirit unclear whether it is real existence or phantom appeared in front of my eyes as a time, trying to stop my advancing. However, if I stop here because of a fear, the evil spirit would necessarily attack me, becoming real existence clearly. "Run anyway!". I, when ordering me like that and rousing my mind apt to become weak, ran on the grassy plain desperately. It is that it tore a phantom vision which is about to become real existence, with the running and went through it. And, it rolled into the forest of the mountain in question hurrying as if it is the hare being chased by a fox. When I look around, it can see one hollow like a cave at a base of a big cedar. It looks to be convenient for avoiding this storm. I, when rolling into the hollow reflexively, stared at the horrible view that the weird storm tramples on the forest.
	Whenever the cold wind makes the bushes' leaves wave to the left and right direction, the phantom of evil spirits often appear among the twigs and leaves, and melt into the storm, soon. And, countless leaves got torn off together with twigs because of the strong wind, getting frozen in an instant. "Is this hollow safe really?" I would ice at once if that cold wind blows on this hollow directly. Doubts, uneasiness and a fear keep on sticking my mind as if it is needles. And the wind sound like an evil spirit's roar resounding often into the storm makes the atmosphere in the forest tremble. I, when pushing oneself to the bottom of the hollow, held my knees with my arms, and kept on standing a fear single-mindedly. However, it feels strange. Although the storm is hard so unusual that it looks to blow away all, this hollow is warm, without being influenced by the wind at all. I got bewildered of the thing terribly, witnessing the frozen forest in front of the eyes. I once heard that the sprite guarding a forest is living in any forest. By any chance, the reason why I'm safe here may be because the sprite living in this forest is guarding me from this storm. However, unfortunately there at all isn't the thing I met the sprite until now. The obvious thing is only the fact that I'm safe for the moment, if being in this hollow, though I don't know why it is so. For me, the sprite guarding the forest still was the gift from the imagination persistently. However I accepted the fact or result as the fact or result persistently. It was because that is the only fruit I could get from this long travel. Anyhow, the weird storm seems to weaken gradually. And, the horrible phantom vision looks to fade out as well. And I suddenly heard the horrible wind sound like the roaring an evil spirit gives off regretfully. By any chance, would it be my illusion? Anyhow, it is certain the storm is weakening. When it notices, the forest had become quiet. And good scent the trees are giving off permeated my mind rapidly. The sense of the tiredness and relief produce the impulse to sleep as if it is Morpheus or other. I fell into the deep sleep, leaning on the side wall of the hollow.
	The physical world the cognition-subject sees."					The dream like reality./Introduction."
Cotosiro